Too Little, Not Too Late

Do you ever wonder "What the fuck am I doing with my life?" I do. Constantly.

Sometimes I'll go on Facebook and stalk people who seem to have found their calling. I'm so happy for these people, but at the same time, incredibly envious.

I have a sneaking suspicion, though, that I don't always have the full story and everyone envies someone for something. I'm learning that the trick is being happy with what you've got. Don't get me wrong, feeling fulfilled doesn't mean you stop striving for just means you're not miserable on the way there.

Here's an exercise: instead of measuring your wealth by your career prospects, real estate holdings and stock portfolio (or lack thereof), measure it by the friends who would help you move apartments and family members who would give you a kidney. Numbers don't matter. If you have even one friend or family member who would do these things, you're blessed. That person is your treasure.

Now, the following is sick and I apologize, but sometimes it takes a mite of the macabre to understand something so beyond everyday comprehension.

Imagine a normal day. You wake up a little later than usual because you pressed the snooze button a couple times. You turn on the tv to find out that everyone you love has been killed in a horrifying natural disaster.


The iPhone you left in the cab last night, the missed deadline, the guy who won't call you back, the car you rear-ended, the shoes you covet but can't afford, the annoying neighbor, the procrastination, the coverletters that aren't getting you job interviews.


There's a great Op-ed in the NYTimes by Nicholas Kristof. I will never be able to explain this as well as he can, but basically he says that doing good things for others makes you feel good. Generosity has a selfish benefit; ain't nothing wrong with that. Check it -- Mama Kim cuts her own hair and uses the money she would spend on a monthly haircut to sponsor children through World Vision. In the beginning she looked like Bruce Lee, but now she's a pro and looks tres chic. People stop her all the time to ask her where she gets her hair done. Her pride is doubled and her smile shows it.

I'm not saying you have to donate (although if you want to and you're just not sure where to, this site will help you), I'm saying the key to happiness is cherishing your life and loved ones more than anything else.

I'm saying reevaluate your shit.

Stop asking "What the fuck am I doing with my life?" and start living it. Meanwhile, I'll try to take my own advice.


  1. Late in his life Malcolm Forbes; the founder of Forbes magazine, multi-millionare, etc; was asked when he knew what he wanted to do with the rest of his life. His response - "I still haven't figured it out. I don't know what I want to do. I just do what I want to do now."

    Or as Wooderson says, "I'm livin', man - L.I.V.I.N. Yeah."

  2. Hey Tom! I really like these quotes. Thanks for sharing!

  3. i finally caught up with your blog! it's really good. anyway, how could Patrick help but be in love with you, missy hana kim? susan